This week on Ignored Prayers I found a few things I deemed noteworthy… and by noteworthy I mean utterly offensive… and by utterly offensive I mean fucking hilarious.  Ultimately it is my duty to pick the best one every week.  So without further adieu let’s get wet already.  First and foremost we have ThisIsWhyYoureFat.com.  Holy fuck.

The Meat Ship.

Did you hear me?  I said a fucking MEAT SHIP.  Are you kidding me? Really? If so I’d like to pose a question to you… Why a ship?  Why not a Unicorn fucking a Dolphin or a Nativity Scene?  A ship?  I am dying to hear the story behind this.  I’d like to imagine it as an homage to a pirate or something way more innuendo.  We can only hope for further details at this point. BTW: This is made from bacon, sausages, pastry, franks and pork mince in case you are still reading this.

Wait for it… it gets better.

The Happy Meal Pizza.

Apparently the two were not bad enough for you on their own… Nope, not so fast… Brilliance Ahead.

The Corn Dog Pizza.

Ok so this one might be fucking savory.  It combines two faves, but I am going to have to deduct points for the difficulty in eating factor.  They did not stick the landing here and that will cost them.  Luckily this is a qualifier round and they can still redeem themselves come dinner.

Turbaconucken.

This here is a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey, all wrapped in bacon.  Listen,I am not going to front,  I too am completely comfortable being emotionally detached from my food but this is just a slap in the face.  I just threw up in my mouth and it was better than this.

The Ultimate Snack Stadium.

When I first saw this son of a bitch I thought the perimeter was made of Subway sandwiches and got excited… only to find out they are in fact Twinkies, at which point I experienced something I like to refer to as “16 Boners.”  ‘Nuff said.

Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburgers

Fuck you.  Already…

Lastly I would like to send you off with 2 reasons the rest of the world hates America.

Ladies and Gents I present Exhibit A:

And Exhibt B:

I rest my case you gluttonous swine.

JK OMG!!!

See ya next week on an all-new installment of Ignored Prayer of the week.

Love ya, Mean it!

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